This morning, I walked to San Rufino's and prayed. I was so encouraged and strengthened. I spent time in my usual routine of opening prayers (memorized from a prayer book), some of my own thoughts, then silence, then the Jesus prayer. I prayed for Tim Bond, the guy doing most of the preaching at home while I'm away. I prayed for the Wooten family. I prayed for Gram's family who will say goodbye to her at her funeral service this morning, when the sun moves around to that side of the earth. Then I meditated once more on Psalm One. (I have been continually drawn to this Psalm as I've prayed here in Assisi. My father had me memorize it when I was a boy, and that gift of his continues to pay dividends.)
After these prayers, I decided to go to Santa Chiara's church. The sun is shining brightly against the stone walkway--the sidewalks and streets where I step. At least it shines where it can between stone walls to my right and to my left. Ancient stone structures, many of them. A stiff breeze sifts my soul and I'm reminded of the prayers I've just prayed asking Holy Spirit to sift me of all but himself, his Father and God the Son.
And without warning, my heart erupts in joy. I'm in Assisi. I'm walking up streets and steps and down streets of steps which strengthen my body, as the time spent in prayer rebuilds my faith--my spirit. I am alive again, walking from prayer to prayer, from strength to strength.
I thank God for the LIlly Endowment and their unbelievable gift of this time and this place. I thank God for my congregation back home which applied for this grant, then took the step of allowing us this time.
I look into the light blue sky, with its lacy cloudy whisps bowing just beneath the sun's glory. I AM HERE. I am unworthy. I am so very grateful. And I am once more...ALIVE.
I can scarcely take in the Joy who meets me in this day. But I determine that in this new life, beginning here in Medieval Europe, I will never forsake him.
(Later today Shelly and I plan to re-visit San Damiano's church and convent just down the side of the mountain from Assisi. Perhaps she will post some pix at her blog. Stay tuned at http://www.michelehayes.wordpress.com.
I also want to offer, upon my return in mid December, to meet with any pastor, or church leadership team who might want to consider a sabbatical for the purpose of clergy renewal.)
Showing posts with label prayer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label prayer. Show all posts
Monday, October 18, 2010
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
IN A TOMB. THINKING OF HOME
IN A TOMB. THINKING OF HOME
I'm sitting in a tomb. It is also an ancient church. Straight before me some twenty feet, are the remains of Saint Francis of Assisi. All around and beneath me are the remains of his faithful friends, and others who have been left here...forever.
A mass is taking place at the other end of this long, lower basilica. Prayers are being sung in beautiful, ancient and monastic tones. All around me, wide-eyed visitors and pilgrims meander, observing the sights and nuances of this beautiful, cave-like place: Frescoes from masters of the middle ages and after, rounded Romanesque arches, small chapels with candles glimmering, and an altar placed over Francis' grave...placed here in 1230 AD.
CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR
I've never thought of being remembered with such devotion eight hundred years from now. But I do like the idea I've heard so many times--the challenge to "Do something great for God." And as I sit pondering the phenomena of this saint and others, I wonder: "What does it look like to "do something great for God?"
My spirit is learning a great deal from the life of St. Francis. But I don't want to mimic him. He renounced everything in order to live the life of a beggar. He owned nothing except for his ragged robe, belt and sandals. He slept in caves while in the mountains to pray, and under temporary shelters of piled branches when at home. He loved and cared for lepers, and looked after the poor and disenfranchised; and he led a disheveled band of followers who took vows to the same poverty, chastity and obedience as his own. WHY?
WHAT GOD NEEDED FROM FRANCIS
In a day when the church was arrogant, wealthy, powerful and pride-filled, God needed someone to point to the lowly Jesus. God needed a wealthy and popular young guy from Assisi to renounce knighthood with its fame, his famous parties with their camaraderie and revelry, and his wealth with its comforts, opulence and security. And so Francis rejected fame, camaraderie, revelry, comfort, opulence and security; in order to turn his heart toward his true love.
And at the end of his brief life, he said something like this: "I have been faithful to obey God's call for me. Now you each must go and do as he calls you."
HIS HUMBLE HOME
This morning, Shelly and I hiked down the mountainside to the site of Francis' death. Here is the tiny church which he called home. There is room for only a couple of dozen people inside of the church at once, it is so small. But this is where Francis obediently went to pray and minister. He lived his life and died his death in its shadow. This humble place was away from the seats of power and attention of the powerful. From here Francis went to bless the poor, the lepers and those who had been excommunicated from the city. In this tiny chapel he lived his poor life and met with Mighty God.
As we approached this place this morning, my heart despaired for the saint. Coming around a corner, what met our eyes is the tenth largest church in all of Roman Catholicism. A huge Golden statue stands atop, and others are carved into the entrance high above the building. And finally, inside the cathedral and at the front, is the actual tiny stone building where Francis met with Jesus, and from which he went forth to be HIS person and presence.
FINDING HOME
In the heart of every lover of Jesus, there is a humble center. A place of prayer without which they cannot exist. Here they meet with the humble Jesus, who pleads with them and then strengthens them to mightily do his humble service. Only here are they able to hear and understand Christ's calling on their lives. And when their time comes to die, it will be to this humble quiet and lonely place they will return...where Jesus is central and the only treasure...no matter the lore or titles or edifices which might follow.
(For pictures of our days and much more consistent posting, be sure to stay-tuned to Shelly's blog.)
I'm sitting in a tomb. It is also an ancient church. Straight before me some twenty feet, are the remains of Saint Francis of Assisi. All around and beneath me are the remains of his faithful friends, and others who have been left here...forever.
A mass is taking place at the other end of this long, lower basilica. Prayers are being sung in beautiful, ancient and monastic tones. All around me, wide-eyed visitors and pilgrims meander, observing the sights and nuances of this beautiful, cave-like place: Frescoes from masters of the middle ages and after, rounded Romanesque arches, small chapels with candles glimmering, and an altar placed over Francis' grave...placed here in 1230 AD.
CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR
I've never thought of being remembered with such devotion eight hundred years from now. But I do like the idea I've heard so many times--the challenge to "Do something great for God." And as I sit pondering the phenomena of this saint and others, I wonder: "What does it look like to "do something great for God?"
My spirit is learning a great deal from the life of St. Francis. But I don't want to mimic him. He renounced everything in order to live the life of a beggar. He owned nothing except for his ragged robe, belt and sandals. He slept in caves while in the mountains to pray, and under temporary shelters of piled branches when at home. He loved and cared for lepers, and looked after the poor and disenfranchised; and he led a disheveled band of followers who took vows to the same poverty, chastity and obedience as his own. WHY?
WHAT GOD NEEDED FROM FRANCIS
In a day when the church was arrogant, wealthy, powerful and pride-filled, God needed someone to point to the lowly Jesus. God needed a wealthy and popular young guy from Assisi to renounce knighthood with its fame, his famous parties with their camaraderie and revelry, and his wealth with its comforts, opulence and security. And so Francis rejected fame, camaraderie, revelry, comfort, opulence and security; in order to turn his heart toward his true love.
And at the end of his brief life, he said something like this: "I have been faithful to obey God's call for me. Now you each must go and do as he calls you."
HIS HUMBLE HOME
This morning, Shelly and I hiked down the mountainside to the site of Francis' death. Here is the tiny church which he called home. There is room for only a couple of dozen people inside of the church at once, it is so small. But this is where Francis obediently went to pray and minister. He lived his life and died his death in its shadow. This humble place was away from the seats of power and attention of the powerful. From here Francis went to bless the poor, the lepers and those who had been excommunicated from the city. In this tiny chapel he lived his poor life and met with Mighty God.
As we approached this place this morning, my heart despaired for the saint. Coming around a corner, what met our eyes is the tenth largest church in all of Roman Catholicism. A huge Golden statue stands atop, and others are carved into the entrance high above the building. And finally, inside the cathedral and at the front, is the actual tiny stone building where Francis met with Jesus, and from which he went forth to be HIS person and presence.
FINDING HOME
In the heart of every lover of Jesus, there is a humble center. A place of prayer without which they cannot exist. Here they meet with the humble Jesus, who pleads with them and then strengthens them to mightily do his humble service. Only here are they able to hear and understand Christ's calling on their lives. And when their time comes to die, it will be to this humble quiet and lonely place they will return...where Jesus is central and the only treasure...no matter the lore or titles or edifices which might follow.
(For pictures of our days and much more consistent posting, be sure to stay-tuned to Shelly's blog.)
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